"Professor Nutbutter's House of Treats"
m. Les Claypool, Larry Lalonde, Tim "Herb" Alexander
l. Les Claypool

Tales From The Punchbowl (1995)


C'mon kiddies gather round, who's your foremost friend in town?
From main to maple the name resounds, Professor Nutbutter.
He's the one, the humble one, the Barkley County prodigal son.
Here to serve only you, Professor Nutbutter.
At old Nutbutter's house of treats from jellied jams to sacks of sweets,
There's creamy and nutritious spreads for all.
Chemist, master of entomology the professor for a modest fee
Will cure what ails you, guaranteed Professor Nutbutter.
It's alright, don't fear the worm.
C'mon kiddies don't be shy be youthful til the day you die.
The man, the myth, the magic of Professor Nutbutter.
He's the one the only one the Meeklybville prodigal son.
Here to help us with ourselves, Professor Nutbutter
It's alright to fear the worm. It's alright to fear the worm.
The worm, the worm is our friend


"Mrs. Blaileen"
m. Les Claypool, Larry Lalonde, Tim "Herb" Alexander
l. Les Claypool

Tales From The Punchbowl (1995)


Mrs. Blaileen - she was a sixth grade teacher
And she controlled the children by using humiliation.
The target always seemed to be Donny, he was a bit slower than the others.
When he was quite young his mother died at the kitchen table
While choking on some food.
The fashion of the day was bleach and tied Levi's.
Donny decided to make some, but he didn't know to rinse them.
So he came to school a reekin', bleach stenched filled the classroom.
Mrs. Blaileen began to chastize. She made him feel like an asshole, two feet small.
Oh what a lonely boy.
Don and Ronald, they always stuck together
For they were a bit different than the others
And they were as tight as brothers then Ronald moved away.
Now Steven, he was year or two younger and he really thought he was something.
He liked to harass other children or anyone he found outnumbered.
Alone Don walks from fishing. Steven and his friend they stop him.
They took his hat and they taunt him, pimp-slap him with a newspaper.
Don lunged forward with his fish knife then ran all the way home weeping.
He gave his knife to his father and said "I think I hurt Steve."
Oh what a lonely boy.


"Wynona's Big Brown Beaver"
m. Les Claypool, Larry Lalonde, Tim "Herb" Alexander
l. Les Claypool

Tales From The Punchbowl (1995), They Can't All Be Zingers (2006)


Wynona's got herself a big brown beaver and she shows it off to all her friends.
One day, you know, that beaver tried to leave her
So she caged him up with cyclone fence.
Along came Lou with the old baboon and said "Recognize that smell?"
"Smells like seven layers, that beaver eats Taco Bell."
Now Rex he was a Texan out of New Orleans and he travelled with the carnival shows.
He ran bumper cars, sucked cheap cigars and he candied up his nose.
He got wind of the big brown beaver, so he though he'd take himself a peek,
But the beaver was quick and grabbed him by the kiwis
Now he ain't pissed for a week. (And a half!)
Now Wynona took her big brown beaver, and she stuck him up in the air.
Said "I sure do love this big brown beaver and I wish I did have a pair."
Now the beaver onces slept for seven days and it gave us all an awful fright.
So I tickled his chin and I gave him a pinch and the bastard tried to bite me.
Wynona loved her big brown beaver and she stroked him all the time.
She pricked her finger one day and it occurred to her she might have a porcupine.


"Southbound Pachyderm"
m. Les Claypool, Larry Lalonde, Tim "Herb" Alexander
l. Les Claypool

Tales From The Punchbowl (1995), They Can't All Be Zingers (2006)


Quite a surprise, what an ingenious device
Boredom encompasses my time, I don't know what I should do
Indulging a moment of your time, seldom the breeder of lies
But you won't believe that it's true, they take to the sky, Southbound Pachyderm
Pinholes through cardboard at the Sun passing the bucks by one by one
Leaving nothing in return, watching the majest blow past
Speculating which will be the last, savoring my piece of pie
And there is no reprise, they're filling the sky, Southbound Pachyderm


"Space Farm"
m. Les Claypool, Larry Lalonde, Tim "Herb" Alexander
Tales From The Punchbowl (1995)


"Year of The Parrot"
m. Les Claypool, Larry Lalonde, Tim "Herb" Alexander
l. Les Claypool

Tales From The Punchbowl (1995)


In the year of our Lord, call it 1994
A fine vintage of mimicry, there are those that take their sound
From someone else's Toil
Liking to parrots you see, I've seen the likes of Kate Bush and Van Morrison
Teaching the parrots to sing, take a Zepplin riff and you alter it a bit
And make lots of money, it's called plagiarism
You want some of that cheese, just take a big ol' bite
Careful not to choke on it please, now here we go, it's called plagiarism


"Hellbound 17 1/2 (Theme From)"
m. Les Claypool, Larry Lalonde, Tim "Herb" Alexander
l. Les Claypool

Tales From The Punchbowl (1995)


Questions deserving answers, answers deserving action
What am I of the populi, I am but a fraction
Is there heaven? Is there Hell? Is that tuna melt I smell? Come on


"Glass Sandwich"
m. Les Claypool, Larry Lalonde, Tim "Herb" Alexander
l. Les Claypool

Tales From The Punchbowl (1995)


He stood in line with the rest and waited got his chance
To take his place behind the glass and watch the ladies dance
It's the nature of things, he stepped into the darkened space
The air was thick and warm, he drops the coins in one by one
The scene unfolds before him, he stands looking eye to thigh
As she looks down from above, only to be recognized as his former love
It's the nature of things


"Del Davis Tree Farm"
m. Les Claypool, Larry Lalonde, Tim "Herb" Alexander
l. Les Claypool

Tales From The Punchbowl (1995)


Del Davis sold a Christmas tree, stood up to 8 feet tall
Season was lookin' mighty thin, he'd hoped to sell 'em all
Here he comes with a dollar in his hand, represents the epitomized man
The boy liked rock 'n' roll, seemed that's the way he paid his way
With the help of Del and them "Doogs," there's a bit more joy this holiday
Here he comes...


"De Anza Jig"
m. Les Claypool, Larry Lalonde, Tim "Herb" Alexander
l. Les Claypool

Tales From The Punchbowl (1995)


Oh I can still remember Jenny Hernando
She was my little lovely one when I was seventeen.
I remember the day that she gave me her viriginity
And then she gave it to everyone in our vicinity.
Oh I can still remember Julie Tolentino the dancing Filipino, we used to run around.
Her and Flouncin' Freddy were going hot and steady.
Now she runs a dyke bar, the biggest one in town.
I can still remember my old friend Todd Squelati
I watching him snort a milkshake right up his nose.
He slurped it up the left side, blew it out the right side.
How he ever kept it down, I will never know.
Of course I still remember ol Flouncin' Freddy
We were pumping gas down at El Sobrante Shell
His Mustang was his pride n' joy, he liked to dance the cowboy,
Hanging out at Jack In the Box but eat at Taco Bell.


"On The Tweek Again"
m. Les Claypool, Larry Lalonde, Tim "Herb" Alexander
l. Les Claypool

Tales From The Punchbowl (1995)


Used to come around here to peddle his wares
A lot more takers now the turkey "J"
You can taste the air around your face
His name was Barrest Jeffries, they picked him up twice
For cooking up amphetamine, now he's on the tweek again
Drinking county prune, he doesn't mind so much
So we'd sit around the fire, singing "Kumbaya," "Kumbaya", I said


"Over The Electric Grapevine"
m. Les Claypool, Larry Lalonde, Tim "Herb" Alexander
l. Les Claypool

Tales From The Punchbowl (1995), They Can't All Be Zingers (2006)


They headed southward from San Francisco, to be with Chuckles and the others.
With electric in the air and peroxide in their hair, they looked like golden brothers.
They drove a Datsun, an automatic, the radio blaring static,
He made a face into the light and burst out laughing at the sight.
The hysteria ensuing would dominate the night from all the candy
The seats were sticky as they were drawn into the grapevine.
Then "Introduce Yourself" came on as they barreled through the gog.
The demon puffing madly on a mentholated log.
They were tired, they were sleepy, so they parked behind the Roxy.
Adam left to use the phone, so he sat there all alone,
When Adam's voice come beaming through on the radio, he started laughing...


"Captain Shiner"
m. Les Claypool, Larry Lalonde, Tim "Herb" Alexander
Tales From The Punchbowl (1995)